I have always been physically on the more petite side. Growing up, I did competitive gymnastics so I was always in shape and took care of myself. I never had to worry about gaining weight.
In my early to mid twenties, I put on some weight, but not enough for me to feel badly about myself. I was still content with the way I looked.
Fast forward to my pregnancies. With Rylie, I was all belly. And I lost the weight very quickly after I had her. It was honestly so easy.
But 6 months later, I was pregnant again. It was like my body knew exactly what it was doing because by 9 weeks, I was showing. By the end of my pregnancy with J, I had people stopping me at stores asking me if I was having twins. (Pro tip: NEVER ask a woman if she is having twins. I don’t care how big she looks).
After I had J and my depression and anxiety were off the charts, I didn’t have the energy to worry about how I looked. I had no time to exercise, ate whatever I wanted, and drank wine every single night to help me cope. I was the heaviest I had ever been.
I knew I wasn’t happy with the way I looked, but I was stuck in these habits that can be so hard to break.
In February of 2020, I decided to start Weight Watchers. It was SO helpful for me. I dropped almost all of my baby weight by June. I finally felt good about myself again.
But let’s look at it this way: you are in the same body for your whole life. You grow up, your body goes through changes, but its so hard to comprehend that you will go through something that will completely alter your body permanently. And that’s what pregnancy does to moms.
Now, working out is just in my daily routine. It helps my mental health and it helps me feeling confident in my body and in my ability to prioritize myself.
It can be so hard to break bad habits. I read something recently that said “choose your hard”. Working out is hard, but so is being unhealthy. There are so many things in life that are hard, but if you focus on what will help you in the long run, that is where you can find success.
I recognize that I am lucky that I was able to lose weight and keep it off. That my metabolism is higher than most and that I don’t struggle constantly with my weight. Because I know a lot of people do.
But what I encourage you to do if you are struggling, is to make peace within yourself.
Honestly, it is so easy to not like what you see when you look in the mirror. We are our own harshest critics. But WHY? How silly is that? If anybody deserves your love, it is YOU. You deserve to be loved by yourself.
When you look in the mirror, I encourage you to focus on the things that you LIKE about yourself. Where you place your energy is the most important thing.
If you place your energy and your mind on the negative things that you don’t like about yourself, how can you expect to be happy? We must start learning how to be KIND to ourselves. It’s truly the most important thing in the world.
I find that when I am feeling good within myself, everything around me falls into place and is so much easier. It’s like my good vibes are contagious.
When I was depressed, anxious, and overweight, I remember being so pessimistic and I think everyone in my life could feel that. Whatever energy you put out into the universe is going to come back to you.
I am CONSTANTLY making sure I speak kindly to myself. That I point out all of the things in my life that I am proud of. That I do not focus on the negative things that happen to me.
I know it is tough when your body goes through changes. But that’s just a part of life.
The only thing we can control is how we react to those changes. Work on being kind to yourself. Give yourself grace. Don’t want until you lose 5 pounds to be happy – focus on being happy RIGHT NOW.
We don’t know what the future holds. It is so important to live in the present moment.
You are beautiful just the way you are.